The Tire

At Sydney University, there were four students taking Organic Chemistry. They did so well on all the quizzes, midterms and labs, etc., that each had an "A" so far for the semester. These four friends were so confident with the finals approaching that the weekend before, they decided to go down to Canberra and party with some friends there. They had a great time.

However, after all the hard partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Sydney until early Monday morning - the morning of their final exam! Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor AFTER the exam and explain to him why they missed it. They explained that they had gone to Canberra to do some research in the ANU archives for the weekend with the plan to come back in time to study, but, unfortunately, they had a flat tire on the way back, didn't have a spare, and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they only just arrived now!

The professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up their final exam the following day. The guys were elated and relieved. They studied hard that night - all night - and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them. He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, and told them to begin. The first problem was worth five points. It was something simple about free radical formation. "Cool," they all thought in their separate rooms, "this is going to be easy." Each finished the problem and then turned the page.

Question 2 (for 95 points): Which tire?

[This story was found at: http://www.allinspiration.com/Education/Lighthearted/the_tyre.html]

Slaying Sacred Cows

There is a saying that Frederick the Great (1712-1786) lost the Battle of Jena (1806), meaning that for twenty years after his death, the army perpetuated his successful organization instead of adapting to meet the changes in the art of war.

Many rules outlive the purpose for which they were intended. What rule, policy, or way of thinking has been successful for you in the past but may be limiting you now? What sacred cow can you slay?

From Creative Whack Packs (www.creativewhack.com) Green (Judge) Card #40

Pop Quiz

A college English class was studying often-used proverbs. One day, their teacher gave them a pop quiz to see how well they were paying attention. She told her students to take out a piece of paper. She would read one half of the proverb, and they were to write the second half. Here are some of the answers the teacher received:

It’s always darkest before...Daylight Savings Time
Never underestimate the power of...termites
Don’t bite the hand that...looks dirty
If you lie down with dogs, you’ll...stink in the morning
An idle mind is...the best way to relax
A penny saved is...not much
Two’s company, three’s...the Muskateers
Children should be seen and not...spanked or grounded
If at first you don’t succeed...get new batteries
Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and...you have to blow your nose

By What Measure?

Sixty-four years ago a Philadelphia congregation watched as three nine-year-old boys were baptized and joined the church. Not long after, unable to continue with its dwindling membership, the church sold the building and disbanded.

One of those boys was Tony Campolo, who is now a well-known evangelical pastor, author and sociologist at Eastern University in Pennsylvania. Over his many years of Christian service, Tony has boldly challenged millions of people all over the world to respond to God’s boundless love by combining personal discipleship, evangelism, and social justice.

"Years later, while doing research in the archives of our denomination," Tony said, "I decided to look up the church report for the year of my baptism. There was my name, and Dick White's. He's now a missionary. Bert Newman, now a professor of theology at an African seminary, was also there.

'It has not been a good year for our church,' the report read. 'We have lost 27 members. Three joined and they were only children.'"

[submitted by Sarah Howe Miller]

All We Can Do For You Now

Elmer Bendiner, in his book The Fall of Fortresses, describes one bombing run over the German city of Kassel:

Our B-17 (The Tondelayo) was barraged by flak from Nazi antiaircraft guns. That was not unusual, but on this particular occasion our gas tanks were hit. Later, as I reflected on the miracle of a twenty-millimeter shell piercing the fuel tank without touching off an explosion, our pilot, Bohn Fawkes, told me it was not quite that simple.

On the morning following the raid, Bohn had gone down to ask our crew chief for that shell as a souvenir of unbelievable luck. The crew chief told Bohn that not just one shell but eleven had been found in the gas tanks—eleven unexploded shells where only one was sufficient to blast us out of the sky. It was as if the sea had been parted for us. Even after thirty-five years, so awesome an event leaves me shaken, especially after I heard the rest of the story from Bohn.
He was told that the shells had been sent to the armorers to be defused. The armorers told him that Intelligence had picked them up. They could not say why at the time, but Bohn eventually sought out the answer.

Apparently when the armorers opened each of those shells, they found no explosive charge. They were clean as a whistle and just as harmless. Empty? Not all of them.

One contained a carefully rolled piece of paper. On it was a scrawl in Czech. The Intelligence people scoured our base for a man who could read Czech. Eventually, they found one to decipher the note. It set us marveling. 

Translated, the note read: “This is all we can do for you now.”

Parable of the Blacksmith

Once upon a time there was a blacksmith who worked hard at his trade. The day came for him to die. The angel was sent to him, and much to the angel's surprise he refused to go. He pleaded with the angel to make his case before God, that he was the only blacksmith in the area and it was time for all his neighbors to begin their planting and sowing. He was needed. So the angel pleaded his case before God. he said that the man didn't want to appear ungrateful, and that he was glad to have a place in the kingdom, but could he put off going for a while? And he was left.

About a year or two later the angel came back again with the same message: the Lord was ready to share the fullness of the kingdom with him. Again the man had reservations and said: "A neighbor of mine is seriously ill, and it's time for the harvest. A number of us are trying to save his crops so that his family won't become destitute. Please come back later." And off the angel went again.

Well, it got to be a pattern. Every time the angel came, the blacksmith had one excuse or another. The blacksmith would just shake his head and tell the angel where he was needed and decline. Finally, the blacksmith grew very old, weary and tired. He decided it was time, and so he prayed: "God, if you'd like to send your angel again, I'd be glad to come home now." Immediately the angel appeared, as if from around the corner of the bed. The blacksmith said: "If you still want to take me home, I'm ready to live forever in the kingdom of heaven." And the angel laughed and looked at the blacksmith in delight and surprise and said: "Where do you think you've been all these years?" He was home.

(As told by Megan McKenna in her book, Parables: the Arrows of God.)

I Left My Sins at the Supermarket!

A Catholic priest, who had become very deaf in his advancing years, had formed the habit of asking those erring members of his flock who came to his enclosed stall to write their penitences on a slip of paper, instead of speaking them to him. The practice worked fairly well until one day when the father heard a heavily-breathing man enter the visitor's side of the confessional and fumble for a few moments as a small, crumpled piece of paper was passed through the curtain into the old cleric's hand.The confession read: Two cans of beans. Quarter pound ham. Cans of Coke. Four fish filets. Bread rolls. Toilet paper. Large coffee. Soap. Butter.The priest studied the note for a puzzled minute or two and then silently passed the slip back.Suddenly, there came an agonized voice from the stall beside him: "Mother of God, I've left my sins at the supermarket!"

As told by British journalist Godfrey Talbut, and referenced in Executive Newsletter 9:2 (1994), 6.